Arsenal

Beauty and Brains?

I believe it was Woody Allen who put it best when he said:

“The prettiest girls in the world are also the most boring and that’s why some people believe there is no God”.

Perhaps the following footballers agree? These guys seem to have bucked the trend with regard to securing themselves a trophy wife, and may have, quite oddly, selected a partner with whom they actually like.

Whilst to suggest, as Woody does so eloquently, that all beautiful women have no personality is of course absurd, you get the impression that it is a good thing that footballers spend so much time away from home. Most WAGs look the like the archetypical airheads that sit around reading OK! or Hello! or whatever other magazine ends with an exclamation mark, whilst debating the merits of the latest moron Katie Price is bleeding dry through her pointless TV show.

Therefore, it is refreshing to see that not all footballers have succumbed to the pressure to find the nearest beauty queen and get her up the duff asap…

Sol Campbell’s partner Fiona Barratt is the Granddaughter of Sir Lawrence Barratt, and is a Graduate in interior and spatial architecture. She runs an interior design company, and is not your typical WAG. After the 2006 World Cup, Barratt told press:

“They [the paparazzi] had no idea who I was, thought I didn’t have a pot to p**s in and had no idea of my background.

“I didn’t care and got on the bus with my Financial Times and my Sudoku.”

Dirk Kuyt is another football player who didn’t choose to marry a publicity hungry non-entity of woman, and his wife Gertrude chose to continue her work as a nurse even when Kuyt was earning handsomely at Feyenoord. Kuyt told the Daily Mail:

“We met when she was 16 and I was 17 and at a time when I was starting to establish myself as a professional footballer she went to university to train as a nurse.

“Even when I was at Feyenoord she would be doing night shifts, working hard, and I am very proud of her for doing that. She didn’t need to work. But she wanted to help people.”

Dirk and Gertrude Kuyt also established the Dirk Kuyt foundation together, which helps disadvantaged chilfren in Nepal and Brazil. Now correct me if I’m wrong, but it almost sounds like Gertrude Kuyt is doing something for someone else? Nursing? Charity work that she doesn’t choose to carry out on prime-time television for maximum exposure? What’s wrong with her?

Whilst it is not a crime to be beautiful, many of the women that marry footballers, if they did have a brain, seem to have gone for far too long without using it. The WAG brigade seem most interested in designer handbags, big sun glasses and notoriety. That is why it is refreshing to hear that Melanie Slade, Theo Walcott’s girlfriend, has continued to study even though she is dating an England international. Slade has also posed for various magazines, and looks rather lovely in most of them. However, she is also a first-year physiotherapy student at St George’s, University of London, in Tooting, south London.

Other footballers who seem to have married for brains as well as beauty include Claudine Keane, wife of on-loan Celtic striker Robbie Keane, and Lisa Roughead, wife of Manchester United’s Michael Carrick. Claudine Keane has a double first in economics and finance from University College Dublin, whilst Miss. Roughead also has business degree.

Well, there you have it. Some WAGS are actually beautiful, interesting people, and many Premier League footballer’s have girlfriends any man would be proud of (are you listening Jermain Defoe?). Therefore, Woody, I must respectfully disagree. The prettiest girls can be just as intelligent and interesting as the less obviously aesthetically pleasing ladies… you were just looking in the wrong places.

You can find me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/mark0turner

Click on the images below to enlarge pictures

The Top Four

It's not all homophobic and racist chants, you get hot chicks too...

Melanie Slade, innit.

She ain't no ticko, that Mrs Keane

Why the long face, Mrs Carrick?

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