Aston Villa

‘Frustratingly Fair Fifth’ – Says George Caveney

Will we or won’t we? What’s on the mind of every City fan…

Are we going to get fourth place, settle in and give Mancini a shot at taking this almighty club to the next level? Or are we going to lose at Burnley and West Ham and give Birmingham a point (despite turning Arsenal and United over in heartwarming fashion) and fluff it, get rid of Scarf Ace and start the cycle of uncertainty all over? It’s on my mind far too much and it’s not good for me.

My gut feeling is we’ll end up in 5th. It’s going to be as tight as a Hummer in a contraflow – which is great – but I don’t think City are ready or yet worthy of anything more. Let’s be honest, we’ve been lucky with others’ shortcomings this season. If we did get into the Champions League, it might well bring bigger players to the fold, but I don’t think this is what we really need. Plus, I doubt we’d get far, and it’d probably affect our league and cup form. We’d end up with bugger all in June 2011.

I’m right, though. You know I am. I’d love to see us snatch fourth from Droopy’s Spurs, bring in some shrewd signings and really hit Europe next season. But I think a full season with Mancini (who I rate, actually) and time for the core of the squad to learn each other’s chops is the best route to success. And if we did too well too quickly, we’d only have Platini and every underachieving manager in the EPL moaning about ‘money ruining football’. That may be so, folks, but so is watching the Big Four Bore every chuffing season.

Anyway – back to the subject. I think fifth would be ideal in a way, and here’s why. Firstly, I’d rather be realistic and not suffer the usual crushing disappointment after setting targets a little too high. Secondly, it means we’d probably hold on to Mancini. I think he’s doing a great job considering the still-wrapped toys in need of batteries he inherited from Hughes. The only man I’d be almost happy to see replace him would be Mourinho – just cos it’d be interesting… and ridiculous.

Then there’s the ‘slow but steady wins the race’ factor. It’s a stupid phrase used by beige people, but I believe we need a convincing title and domestic cup attempt before we can confidently stride into the big stuff. We’re a big cub with big money, big players and big ambitions. But we haven’t done anything big for feckin’ yonks.

So, I foresee a faintly frustrating but fair fifth finish. And it’ll be for the good of everyone involved. What do you think? Seventh? Docked 80 points and relegated for something Garry Cook does in a monstrous megalomaniac moment of madness? Don’t put it past him…

More on that embarrassing, inept and destructive pillock Cook next time!

Please watch this show HERE tomorrow on C4. Thank you.

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