Chelsea

Roman’s £30M Mischief & £50M Discount Deal …Mancini’s Headaches Pile Up…

Chelsea could be set to restore the planet’s natural balance after halting the Geordie Juggernaut’s resurgence. 

When an achievement so commendable, so improbable, so triumphant as Alan Pardew’s this season in bringing Newcastle back to the forefront (or thereabouts) of English football, then it’s only right that the media begins the snowball of unsettling rumours early this year, out of respect if nothing else.

And two players in particular who have ripened spectacularly under the stewardship of Pardew this term are Tim Krul and Cheick Tiote, and that’s why supply teacher Roberto Di Matteo might (but won’t) get the chance to get his hands on the pair when they’re ready for the picking come the summer. According to the Independent, it appears as though head of Chelsea’s gaggle of puppet masters, Roman Abramovich, wants the pair to boost his ailing squad in a £30 million bid.

Meanwhile, after that bit of light shopping, the Telegraph claim that Chelsea could be in line for the bargain of the summer, with a “cut price” £34 million deal for Hulk in the pipeline. Reports suggest Porto have shuffled embarrassingly away from their original valuation (just the £85 million), and are prepared to take the meager revised sum when Roman (or Pep, or Jose, or John Terry) come knocking.

Today’s exclusive from the Sun is sure to have fans licking their lips, with the highly appropriate headline “Rio and Lampard in Chinese takeaway.” Apart from mild racism and terrible film ideas, the story also offers the prospect of two Premier League stalwarts rocking up to China to continue the country’s (footballing) revolution.

Super League outfit Guizhou Renhe are happy to pay the Manchester United and Chelsea stars a respectable £250,000-a-week each to persuade them to quit England this summer. Guizhou chairman Wang Guolin said: “I want the best team in China and we are prepared to invest a lot of money to bring Ferdinand and Lampard to us. Many people here watch the Premier League and know how good the two players are.”

With the mega rich club also purportedly set to offer Jose Mourinho just about everything bar the power of flight, the sporting world will no doubt be casting a wary eye over at the far east, as the daunting prospect of an overturn in power becomes more and more real by the day.

Edin Dzeko’s a worried man, but this thankfully isn’t due to the politics and uncertainty of our game. The Daily Mail claim the giant striker is unhappy at a lack of opportunities to showcase his unquestionable talent for getting in the way of Sergio Aguero, and could move in a swap deal involving (picks random name out of hat) Gonzalo Higuain, who quite simply isn’t wanted anymore.

Finally Robbie Fowler is set to hobble around for Sheffield Wednesday for the rest of the season, with Dave Jones bravely letting his heart rule his head by offering the former Cardiff player a short term deal, after the striker rejected Blackpool’s £90 a week offer following weeks of thought.

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