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Forget Lawro – Here’s Your Weekend Predictions!

Powderkeg. That’s a great cheesy football word and boy have this weekend’s fixtures got a big one. Sunday sees the likelihood of the boy Torres strolling out before the Liverpool faithful in a Chelsea strip.

Stoke vs Sunderland

Two sides having ‘undistinguished’ seasons. Stoke’s form is marginally worse than Sunderland but they sit just behind Spurs, sixth in the table. Prediction 2-1.

Aston Villa vs Fulham

Aston Villa will unleash Dazza B,  The Bentster. What Fulham are planning to unleash is anyone’s guess. Fulham’s away form is diabolical.The idea that Mark Hughes will  turn this around at Villa Park is optimistic at best. Prediction 2-1.

Everton vs Blackpool

Is it just me or are everyone’s flavour of the week Blackpool experiencing a bout of ‘WheelsComingOff Syndrome?’ With only one win in their last six, it’s not just me. Everton won’t be in the mood for taking any prisoners and no matter how many side splitting yokel quotes we get from ‘Ollie’ the outcome seems certain. Prediction 3-1.

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Manchester City vs West Brom

This could well be carnage. Twisted steaming shards of West Brom players scattered across the Eastlands grass. The Baggies having been courting the relegation zone for weeks now and this could be the day they properly sucked in. Prediction 4-0

Newcastle vs Arsenal

Poor old Toon. If only everyone would leave them alone and let them play football and they’d be doing just fine. Andy Carroll out injured is one thing. Andy Carroll on the telly waving to the Kop is another. Mike Ashley to use the cash to fund 35 trips to a casino is evens. Prediction 1-2.

Tottenham vs Bolton

This has the potential to turn nasty. Boos at half time and burning effigies at full time.  Torres shirts? Pah. Spurs are decimated by injuries and rapidly becoming reliant upon getting the ball up to Crouchinho. Bolton have won only once in their last six. Prediction 2-2.

Wigan vs Blackburn

Blackburn are on fire. Wigan by contrast resemble a car that has been nicked and only minutes ago set alight. Difficult to believe that Wigan even with home advantage can shake anything out of this. Blackburn will quite rightly expect to get a result here. Prediction 1-3.

Wolves vs Manchester United

The Wanderers, barring a miracle look set to be wandering back to the Championship. I’ve warmed to McCarthy this season and surely that alone will make him feel this campaign hasn’t been in vain. United will undoubtedly win this. Rooney and Berbatov have woken up and are bawling the house down. Prediction 1-5.

West Ham vs Birmingham

What they call in the trade a 6 pointer. This won’t be pretty. After the fighting that went on at St Andrews if second rate football matches and full contact street brawling aren’t your thing I suggest you give the Upton Park area of London a swerve this Sunday. Prediction 3-1.

Chelsea vs Liverpool

The Biggie. The Daddy. The Grand Fromage. Two sides who Torres to one side, both emerging from some of their worst form in years. On that basis alone this would be a crackerjack game. If Dalglish can get 3 points here they’ll replace the Liver birds with statues of him. Prediction 2-1.

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Article title: Forget Lawro – Here’s Your Weekend Predictions!

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