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On A Free – But Who Wants Him?

Players require new homes. Expensive Breeds. Require loving, tolerant owner, regular walks in the park.

With the World Cup drawing ever closer we’re likely to be inundated with rumours surrounding the possible purchase of some hitherto unknown Chilean making a move to Blackburn or Wolves thanks to his mesmerizing performance against Honduras.

So let’s get up to date and have a look at those already preparing to spend their future at a currently unknown destination – namely, those players with an expiring contract.

We’ll start with Joe Cole. Where else? The midfielder remains tacit over his future but this morning Chelsea have confirmed that the 28-year-old’s future does indeed lie away from Stamford Bridge.

In a statement on the club’s official website, Chelsea confirmed, “that Joe Cole will be leaving the club upon the expiration of his contract at the end of this month.”

His departure brings an end to a seven year spell at the club.

Like the barely inaudible tone of a dog whistle, that statement should attract anyone in proximity to closer sniff of the prize. Manchester United have been touted as favourites to land the midfielder.  However, Arsenal have also p***** against a nearby lamppost and Cole has not ruled out a move to fellow Londoners Tottenham.

Michael Ballack has also learned today that his contract with the London club will not be renewed.

Elsewhere, Manchester City appear to be having some sort of jumble sale. The odds and ends include Bulgarian mafia hit-man look-a-like Martin Petrov, Benjani – who, if he had a technicolour dreamcoat, would only have one purple patch – and Meals on Wheels candidate Sylvinho.

Believe it or not, Petrov has six (yes, six) clubs stalking him. Tottenham are peering through the window from the tree, Everton are in his closet, Stoke and West Ham are behind the curtains, Bolton haven’t managed to find his address yet, and Martin O’Neill has found himself locked in his bathroom.

Blackburn, meanwhile, are making every effort to tranquilize Benjani. Not a hard task, you would think.

Arsenal have, not unreasonably, put their defence in the shop window this summer. Sol Campbell, Mikael Silvestre and William Gallas are all reportedly out of contract. Campbell is expected to go hyperborean – Celtic to be specific, as long as Arsene Wenger remains unaffected by Sol’s pleas to stay. Gallas, now 32, may be tempted by a move to Greece, assuming Panathinaikos can lend money off the European Union to pay his wages. And Silvestre, well, the French defender is determined to leave the club, but exactly who will take him off Arsene’s books is anyone’s guess.

Could you care for Mikael Silvestre? Give Arsene a call.

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Article title: On A Free – But Who Wants Him?

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