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Premiership Primate Predictor

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The world’s best League is back in business. Forget that Lawro bloke, we’ve hired Charlie The  Chimpanzee on a season long contract and the board at The Tavern are giving him their complete backing. Keep an eye  out for Charlie’s Banker.

Sunderland vs Newcastle

At long last a North East Derby worth watching for us shandy drinking southerners. Sunderland may have changed all their personnel bar the tea lady but they were good enough to mount a comeback against Liverpool. Newcastle also showed they still have a fight in them (literally) against the mighty Arsenal. Prediction: 2-1

Arsenal vs Liverpool

King Kenny had a good opportunity last week and blew it. This week he can send out a huge message by spanking a vulnerable looking Gunners side. Arsenal are in a mess. Who will win this game for them? To be blunt they are rapidly running out of answers. Prediction 1-3

Villa vs Blackburn

So another 90 minutes of McLeish haters sharpening their knives and the Venky Corporation wondering if they should have stuck it all on the England cricket team. This may not be a pretty game but it is so important that sides at this level get points from ties like this. Prediction 2-1.

Everton vs QPR

This will hopefully not be a damage limitation exercise because QPR play good football. And so do Everton. Of all the Saturday games I’d be happy to be watching this one. Prediction a crackerjack 2-2.

Swansea vs Wigan

Swansea City got stuffed by Manchester City but to write the Welsh off on the strength of that would be naive in the extreme. The Swans are a quality outfit. They won’t get many chances better than this. Wigan have great morale, but are scratching beyond that, truth be told. Prediction 3-1.

Chelsea vs West Brom

Quite simply the Blues need a goal. This Torres vs Drogba vs Reality is now not just boring, it’s a joke. And AVB needs to watch his post match whining before he gets branded Wenger 2.0. West Brom? Uncle Woy has it all to do. It was Man Utd last week and I thought they gave a good account of themselves. Prediction 1-0.

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Article title: Premiership Primate Predictor

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