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Spoof: Details of Manchester United star’s mega contract leaked!

On a good year, the Football Transfer Tavern makes profits of around £15,000. Therefore, you can imagine my landlord’s utter disgust at the weekly wage Manchester United will now be paying Wayne Rooney.

This news of contracts and money has surfaced at the worst possible time for me as I was hoping to approach my landlord over a new one for myself.

I’m not asking for much, just for a few more pennies so I can finally realise my dream of buying a campervan and to tour all the big football stadiums in Europe.

I mean, what’s an extra six pence per hour? I don’t think I’m asking for too much, especially when you consider the terms that Rooney and his agent somehow negotiated into his new five-and-a-half-year deal.

I tell you what though, I wouldn’t mind for the tavern to start selling Greggs sausage rolls.

Wayne Rooney

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Article title: Spoof: Details of Manchester United star’s mega contract leaked!

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