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Thursday Night’s [NSFW] Waggadoodle Doo

Chanelle has done well for herself. They say that each generation wants to better the last and she has more than narrowly achieved that. If her Wikipedia page hasn’t been hacked, her mother was a murdered prostitute and addict who gave birth to Chanelle whilst in prison.

In 2007,  Chanelle shot to fame as a sort of Vicky Beckham looky likey. It was a mixed bag awards wise. She was voted 2nd sexiest Big Brother contestant ever and Least Talented Celebrity by the wise and knowing folk that are Dominos Pizza punters.

Chanelle has on and off dated the footballing house hold name that is Middlesbrough’s Matthew Bates. Matthew was tipped to be the next big thing, however an injury on loan at Ipswich put paid to that ambition. But the phrase, ‘Next Big Thing’ never deserted him and shortly afterwards photographs of him kneeling naked, with a semi on, in front of a mirror came into the public domain courtesy of a then girlfriend. The worm that hooked the bird, so to speak. *Ahem*

Things don’t seem to have perhaps been a wholly smooth ride all told and sometime after being admitted to hospital with what was said to be a paracetamol overdose, it was suggested that she was expecting the patter of tiny feet, perhaps ones with football boots on.

I don’t know if she has a family motto, but perhaps ‘Never A Dull Moment’ might be a worthy suggestion.

Well now, when it comes to football, one man has for many years been the most noticeable, the most controversial, and occasionally the most successful blogger this country has ever produced. His pithy words and abrasive style make him as famous off the pitch as he is on it. This man is Escapini. "I love football. Football she's a cruel mistress. She's, she's more than a mistress. She's a wife, she's a mother, she's a daughter, she's an errant child. She's a… she's a… she can make you laugh, she make you cry. She can bring tears me eyes. She can bring blood to me shoulders. She can bring a kettle to the boil." "Cause football is about nothing, unless it's about something and what it is about, is football."

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