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Ferdinand’s Call to Terry The Full Conversation

RF:Alright.

JT:Alright. Who’s this?

RF: It’s Rio….

JT:Rio who?

FR:Rio Ferdinand…you know….the bloke who used to be the England captain.

JT:Alright. You Anton’s brother?

RF:Yeah…listen, I’m just ringing to tell you, no hard feelings bruv…

JT:No worries son. About what?

RF:About me not being the England captain anymore.

JT:What are you talkin’ about mate?

RF:Well, you know how you used to be the England captain…

JT:Alright.

RF:And then, you know we all went to Africa yeah?

JT:Alright.

RF:And you wasn’t the captain no more, yeah?

JT:Yeah….so was you captain, yeah?

RF:Yeah, I was.

JT:Wicked. I thought that Scouse geezer was. You know, the one who who looks like Shrek.

RF:What Wazza?

JT:Is that his name…I thought it was that Jamie…

RF:Whatever bruv, listen…I was the England captain while you wasn’t, and now I’m not the England captain again…

JT:What you ringing me for then? I ain’t even met your missus. Her name ain’t Sheila is it?

Continued on Page 2

RF:No you haven’t bruv…

JT:I’m convinced I haven’t mate.

RF:No you haven’t, but this other thing was was all over Twitter.

JT: What’s Twitter?

RF: Twitter man, it’s like Facebook, only you don’t have any photos and you can’t say very much…

JT: Can’t you like just chuck ’em a pony and say more?

RF:No bruv, it’s supposed to help you connect with the wider world and express yourself on a minute by minute basis.

JT:Alright. So I wasn’t the England captain on Twitter then?

RF: No, I was!

JT:I thought I was the England captain? Do England play in blue?

RF:No bruv…

JT:Do they have loads of foreigners playing for them?

RF:No bruv….

JT:Well who am I thinking of?

RF:Chelsea bruv…

JT:Leave it out geeze.

RF:No bruv, you play for Chelsea right? You’re their captain innit…

JT:Yeah I know, I ain’t fik.

Dial tone as Rio hangs up……

I'm a 23 year old Newcastle United fan, who enjoys watching and playing football, listening to music, watching movies and reading. Actually, none of that's very exciting is it? Erm...I also ran across America, won the Congressional Medal of Honour, have been to the White House 3 times, taught Elvis to dance and helped John Lennon write Imagine. My motto is, 'Life is like a box of chocolates...' no, sorry that's Forrest Gump....

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