It’s staggering to think of how far Arsenal have come in the past few years. Sure, they’ve always been a massive club but seeing Alexis Sanchez and Mesut Ozil line-up every week is a far-cry to the torture Gooners in the Transfer Tavern have had to endure in recent years.
Whilst not every member of the current squad is adored by the faithful fans, the squad as a whole is extremely talented and one of the best in England. Arsenal have done well to shift their deadwood out of the club- and there certainly was a lot of lying around.
The vast array of crap on display in north London in recent years made the latest challenge handed out to our landlord extremely intriguing, as he asked the Gooners in the bar to decide the worst possible XI of players Arsenal have boasted in the past five years.
If you’re reading this as an Arsenal fan, we’re sorry about the torturous memory lane we’re about to drag you down- there’s no sunshine and rainbows on this route!
Hit the image below to see Arsenal’s WORST XI from the past five seasons!
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Manuel Almunia
It all started one night in Paris ten years ago. Jens Lehmann got an early red card and Arsenal fans received a sneak-peek at the coming years, with Manuel Almunia letting Juliano Belletti of all people fire a shot through his legs to see Arsenal concede the Champions League trophy to Barcelona.
The Spanish goalkeeper somehow stayed first-choice Arsenal goalkeeper for a number of years, despite having the aerial presence of a shrew and boasting hands as strong as a wet carrot. For Arsenal’s ‘banter years’, Almunia was an ever-present figure.
He did, somehow, manage to be on the winning side against Barcelona back in 2011- only to be rinsed by Lionel Messi in the second-leg as Arsenal crashed out, setting a precedent for the next five years.
Emmanuel Eboue
When on earth do you start with Emmanuel Eboue? Sure, he’s a folk hero for Arsenal due to the fact he’s bloody hilarious but there’s no doubting the Ivorian defender was downright awful. A personal favourite memory is the full-back fouling Dirk Kuyt in the dying stages of a game with Liverpool, conceding a penalty when the Dutchman was running OUT of the penalty area.
That one incident showed Emmanuel Eboue in his prime and when he lined up for the Ivory Coast in the 2010 World Cup, it showed kids around the world never to give up on their dreams as you always have a chance of deceiving everyone and doing something productive, despite a clear lack of ability.
Sebastian Squillaci
The French centre-half was undoubtably one of Arsene Wenger’s weirdest purchases during his long reign at the club, as it was clear from the off that Sebastian Squillaci didn’t have what it took to be a Premier League defender- especially for a side like Arsenal.
When Squillaci was named on the team sheet, Arsenal fans groaned in unison and it didn’t help that it came at a time where the entire Gunners defence was as leaky as an old piece of guttering. Still, despite piles of mediocrity Squillaci still managed to stand-out as the worst of the bunch.
Mikael Silvestre
From one abysmal centre-half to another, Mikael Silvestre enjoyed success with Manchester United but was never really a regular starter for the Red Devils. He may have had a decent chance to become that at Arsenal, had he arrived a few years earlier.
Instead, Silvestre came to North London in the days where his career was reaching an end and his legs were completely gone. A complete liability in the centre of defence, lining-up alongside Squillaci gave Arsenal fans a living nightmare on numerous occasions.
It’s another situation when you simply have to ask why on earth did Arsene Wenger think this was a good idea?
Andre Santos
Andre Santos arrived as part of a late splurge by Arsene Wenger, aka panic buying, after an embarrassing 8-2 drubbing at the hands of Manchester United. Whilst the likes of Mikel Arteta and Per Mertesacker went on to become successes, Santos’ spell was a disaster.
His brightest moment came during the famous 5-3 victory over London rivals Chelsea but Santos’ defensive frailties were continuously exposed, with the Brazilian keeping up the tradition of having questionable left-backs since Ashley Cole’s departure.
Incidentally, that tradition lasted until Nacho Monreal woke up one day last January as the new Roberto Carlos- and the Spaniard hasn’t looked back since.
Andrei Arshavin
There was a time, not long ago, when Andrei Arshavin was the most expensive signing in Arsenal’s history. At first, there was a sense of jubilation- which magnified when he scored all four goals in a stunning 4-4 draw at Anfield against Liverpool.
From there though, Arshavin’s performances fell quicker than the Soviet Union in the early 90’s. The Russian international quickly became the bearer of a lot of pain for Gooners, as he failed to track back, cross, shoot or do anything that a wide-midfielder is expected to do.
Still, he did score a late winner against Barcelona to give Arsenal their most memorable victory at the Emirates Stadium so that’s something.
Denilson
Arsenal and Brazilians don’t seem to mix well, with Denilson being another testament to this belief. Bizarrely, the youngster managed to sneak under the radar for years before finally being offloaded- despite being one of the worst midfielders the Gunners have had amidst their ranks.
He didn’t score, he didn’t look good on the ball, he didn’t defend well, he didn’t create attacks. Basically, he didn’t do anything apart from infuriate the 60-thousand fans that crammed into the Emirates Stadium every other week.
For seven years, Denilson conned his way into earning a wage with the Gunners. We’re still not sure how.
Mathieu Flamini
Ah, Mathieu Flamini. At first he was a decent defensive midfield, who also stopped in at left-back for a while, but then he left to join AC Milan on a free transfer. He didn’t enjoy much success there and returned a few years later to give Arsenal fans nightmares.
He did score two fantastic goals against Tottenham Hotspur in the League Cup this season but he’s truly been abysmal, forgetting his role in the Gunners squad and leaving the defence exposed as he chases the ball like an excited puppy.
His most recent ‘highlight’ was conceding a penalty against Barcelona just 37 seconds after coming on as a substitute. Magical.
Gervinho
For Arsenal fans, Gervinho was Arshavin 2.0- a player that showed some promise and sometimes gave hope that he could actually be useful, only to then look like Bambi on ice at a later date. The Ivorian was pretty remarkable, just not for good reasons.
He had a fantastic talent of doing something magical to spark some life into a game, before quickly messing it up seconds later. He’d often run past defenders and fall over, slice a shot wide or put a cross in that went straight out of play. When you watched him, it was like he turned the ball into a balloon. Baffling.
Perhaps more bizarre was that he went to Roma and actually did well for a time, before returning to his struggling ways. What was up with his hair anyway?
Park Chu-Young
We do feel kind of bad for putting Park Chu-Young into this team, as he could’ve ended up being the next Pele for all we know. He signed from South Korea, raised the profile of Arsenal within Asia and then did nothing- quite literally.
You could count his Arsenal games on one hand and we’re not actually sure why he was signed. Was it Arsene Wenger showing signs of old age? Did he con Arsenal into believing he was a decent striker? We’ll never though.
The situation of Park Chu-Young’s signing is likely to be an age-old myth for the future, to go along with bigfoot, the moon landing and JFK’s assassination.
Nicklas Bendtner
Y’know, this isn’t really one we should have to explain- it’s Nicklas Bentdner for crying out loud. The Danish striker was famous for all the wrong reasons, notably a select choice of underwear during the European Championships.
What he wasn’t famous for was being a prolific goalscorer, as he’d struggle to throw a stick into the Pacific Ocean. Every 12 games or so he’d miraculously find the net, with what we can only assume to be down to some dark-magic voodoo of some sort, before returning to his awful ways.
He managed to wrangle over 100 Premier League appearances for Arsenal, which is quite staggering.
